Grace: The Antidote to Rejection

Let grace take the place of bitterness in the midst of hurt and rejection


If you are just joining us, we are journeying together through Lysa Terkeurst’s book, “Uninvited.” If you would like to read along, you can get your own copy of Lysa’s book HERE (affiliate link.)

Read the previous post here:

Making Peace With Rejection
True Identity
When Our Perceptions Are Wrong
When Expectations Disappoint Us
Trusting God Instead of Rejection
When Your Friendship Breaks

Today we are looking at chapter 7.

Grace – The Antidote to Rejection

Rejection steals the security of all we thought was beautiful and stable and leaves us scared and fragile and more vulnerable than ever.

Lysa’s words ring true, don’t they? Rejection hurts and robs us of feeling stable. It makes us scared and vulnerable. It stings deeply and makes us want to hide.

You know what else it has the potential to do to us? It can trigger bitterness, anger and cynicism which can eat away at us, make us ugly, and rob us of joy.

In this chapter, Lysa points us to the antidote of rejection, grace. In the midst of feeling hurt and vulnerable, extending grace to the one who rejected us may seem impossible. Lysa gives voice to this feeling aptly:

I’m the one who was hurt, and now I have to be the one to be the bigger person?

When we are hurt, our human tendency is to want to hurt them back or to wish ill on them. The last thing we want to do is to extend grace to them and forgive them.

Grace given when it feels least deserved is the only antidote for bitter rot. ~ Lysa Terkeurst Click To Tweet

I love these next words that Lysa pens for us:

But seeking what’s fair never cracked the world open to reveal the beautiful reality of a Jesus-loving woman.

God never told us that life would be fair, easy, comfortable or perfect. In fact He tells us to expect trouble and suffering and He asks us to face it with grace, humility, surrender, trust and forgiveness. When we submit to this and let go of what we want, let go of “fair,” we are molded, shaped and transformed to become more and more like Christ.

Remember what Christ did for us? Read Philippians 2:1-11

Therefore if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any common sharing in the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, 2 then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind. 3 Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, 4 not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.

5 In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus:

6 Who, being in very nature God,
did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage;
7 rather, he made himself nothing
by taking the very nature of a servant,
being made in human likeness.
8 And being found in appearance as a man,
he humbled himself
by becoming obedient to death—
even death on a cross!
9 Therefore God exalted him to the highest place
and gave him the name that is above every name,
10 that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow,
in heaven and on earth and under the earth,
11 and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord,
to the glory of God the Father.

That is one of my favorite passages in the Bible. It reminds me of the rejection that Christ endured on our behalf and the grace and love he extended in response. Jesus didn’t use His position as God, but humbled himself to the point of death on a cross for our sakes. When we feel rejected, Jesus understands better than anyone what that feels like and he models for us the way to respond.

Since I’m so very aware of my own need for grace, I must be willing to freely give it away. Each hole left from rejection must become an opportunity to create more and more space for grace in my heart.

I encourage you, if you have been rejected, if you have been holding on to anger, bitterness and resentment, choose today to let go. Choose today to follow Christ’s example, extend grace and forgiveness to the one that rejected you and as a result find healing, peace and joy. It’s not easy to do, but you don’t have to do it alone. Turn to Jesus and remember that He knows all too well what rejection feels like and He can give you the strength and help you need to embrace grace and forgiveness.

I pray you will find the peace and joy that is waiting for you!



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6 thoughts on “Grace: The Antidote to Rejection

  1. That’s a great idea to do a Book Study online this way! I love Lysa TerKeurst’s writing. She’s so honest and sounds so “real” I can only hope I would write that way. I know we hear the story of Jesus all the time so it’s easy to overlook the real significance but she’s so right- He WAS rejected! Unwelcome. Uninvited. And yet, he extended grace. Sounds like a good book! Coming to you from the RaRa Link Up today 🙂

  2. Feeling rejected stings deeply. I’m thankful God gives us so many examples in the Scripture to encourage us. Old Testament Joseph and Jesus are two shining pictures of those rejected by people and loved by God.

  3. I bought this book for my mom after she was slighted by a friend. She’d never read a Christian non-fiction book and was instantly captivated by all that Lysa addressed–and she did address that very issue. Good stuff!